Orygun 0 #1 August 3, 2011 Thought I'd provide you all with an update. Here are the top 10 things I have learned so far... 10. I am morbidly obese… …and because of that I am relegated to flying a “huge” canopy – nearly 100 square feet. In an apparent attempt to lessen the social awkwardness created by my “weight problem” – the team is having me wear more weights than I use when I go scuba diving. 9. I can run faster than I ever thought possible… …see number 10. 8. Ibuprofin is better than Tylenol… …since this “CRW Candy” is usually washed down with JD and coke, and the team is very health conscious, they use the pain killer that damages kidneys, not livers. 7. Jello shots are for breakfast… …I really should have known THIS already – I mean, they are portable, fruity, cool, easily digested, and hard to detect on your breath. 6. I am a shitty canopy pilot, shitty, shitty shitty… …I’ve taken a canopy piloting course or two, and always felt that I was a reasonably competent canopy pilot – OH HOW WRONG I WAS! 5. Two goats are worth 1 large bottle of Jack… …important information considering these uncertain financial times. 4. I am a shitty packer, shitty, shitty, shitty… …no D bag? Packing is like poking a cat out from underneath a porch with a wet rope on a 100 degree day. Oh, and hoping you haven’t packed a spinning mal…. 3. When Stretch gives you the “Start Drinking” sign – even if its 10am on Sunday morning before you’ve made your first jump – its best to back away from the aircraft and start drinking… …and get ready to catch tandems – thank God someone was considerate enough to buy cups with lids! 2. Sometimes when the guy below you in the stack is yelling – its not because you are doing a great job as base… …its because you have kicked into his C lines and you are collapsing his canopy. Geesh – the guys can be SO touchy! 1. Never, Never – piss off Sharon… …my first and most important lesson. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sprtdth 0 #2 August 4, 2011 Geez, kidsUnless you've broken Rule #1, you don't know #9 is true. #8 they use the pain killer that damages kidneys, not livers. Uh yea! You have 2 kidneys, but, only 1 liver....ya have to prioritize CRW Skies Frank CRW Diva #58 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
topdocker 0 #3 August 4, 2011 At least you have not had a "manny/peddy" yet! topJump more, post less! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orygun 0 #4 August 4, 2011 QuoteAt least you have not had a "manny/peddy" yet! top Oh Yea - Lesson Learned #11 - NEVER, NEVER - fall asleep. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
topdocker 0 #5 August 4, 2011 QuoteQuoteAt least you have not had a "manny/peddy" yet! top Oh Yea - Lesson Learned #11 - NEVER, NEVER - fall asleep. Lesson #11a- sleep with socks and gloves on. topJump more, post less! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
noname 0 #6 August 4, 2011 0) When the Team Wife comes home from work and gets out of her car, she does not want a hug, she wants a BEER! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orygun 0 #7 August 4, 2011 Quote0) When the Team Wife comes home from work and gets out of her car, she does not want a hug, she wants a BEER! "Team Wife"??? - When's our honeymoon baby? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
topdocker 0 #8 August 4, 2011 QuoteQuote0) When the Team Wife comes home from work and gets out of her car, she does not want a hug, she wants a BEER! "Team Wife"??? - When's our honeymoon baby? Guess I'm off this weekend then. topJump more, post less! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
