sburkart

Spoof site. You guys ought to have your eyes examined. Hey, you know what's good for THAT...?

Oh, you hit a weak spot, or a sore spot, depending on who you ask. Basses: ''70's Hagstrom Swede bass (bought new) Moses Graphite Starhawk bass (original version) Pres: 2 Kern IP-777 ART Nightbass SE Raven Labs PBA-1 FX: Zvex Whooly Mammoth Fulltone Bassdrive Akai Uni Bass Akai Deep Impact Lexicon Vortex Aphex 204 Power: Carvin DCM 1500 QSC RMX-850 Cabs: 2 Music Man Audiophile 210HD 2 Music Man Aduiophile 212HD Most of the rig is new, I had a serious case of G.A.S. that I THINK is in remission, though I have been looking at the Boomerang and some synth modules and MIDI controllers lately. Thank God I still owe a little on the Vector 3M and Lotus. LOL!

I've bought 14 or so items off of eBay (bass guitar pre's, amps, cabs, effects), and probably another dozen small ticket items through CD Baby, Barnes & Noble, Amazon, Foot Locker and the like. One bad eBay experience was a Godin A4 fretless bass that was obviously damaged before shipping (I think the guys ex probably stomped it on her way out the door- he was such an asshat I don't blame her) and I lost the shpping on that one. CD Baby is very cool- and strange... Not ONCE have I received a CD in a gold-lined box from these people. I've been ripped-off I tell ya!

I don't think the order in which he did this would really matter, all I know is if it were me there's no freakin' way I coulda done the second after having done the first no matter how high I was. (Not currently high no matter how that reads...)

December 3rd for the joke and the pic.

£14052. Hell, I'd get more on eBay...

Ditto! Man, that was a mess. Even though I'm in the habit of running elm first and deleting the obvious B.S., this thing was being sent from so many sites so often that when I went to Outlook even more was coming in. Thanks again to WFFC for turning me on to Avast!

LMAO!

There are no absolutes, but, as is clearly demonstrated in the migrating birdy link above, Reason #10 (or a variation thereof) could be more than enough cause for any self-reliant skydiver types to reconsider the possbility that they could find themselves in a once-in-a-lifetime situation that could never have been forseen, and which may or may not have results ranging from feather-filled orifice syndrome to inter-species 3D-RW, any of which could lead to The Most Famous and Unlikely Incident of All Time. Needless to say, those of the Cypres Generation won't have this particular issue. NEXT!

LOL! Well, your statement poses another question I don't know the answer to, namely bird populations, but I Googled "migratory bird altitudes" and it came back with a great graphic: Bird Migrating Altitudes It's entirely within the realm of possibilty that a skydiver could inadvertantly get into 3D-RW with anything from flocks of songbirds to Canadian Geese at up to 11,000ft. and ducks or geese up to 16,000ft. Note that it is possible to collide with seabirds and shorebirds, as well as eagles, vultures and hawks at up to +21,000ft. and Bar-headed geese at up to 30,000ft., but at those altitudes 3D-RW with wildlife is probably the least of your problems, IMHO. Huh. And here I thought I was making a joke.

I was looking around the forums and saw a thread on how the Neverending Cypres Debates From Hell were getting old for a lot of people, so I decided to end the thing once and for all via reading aloud every thread pertaining to the subject and having the resulting recording studied using Reverse Speech Analysis in order to devine the suspected hidden motivations of various posters. Conclusion: Reverse Speech Analysis is total hokum, but Joe Walsh can clearly be heard to say "Resneff!" -which is actually "Thank you"- played in reverse at the end of James Gang Live album. That effort having failed, I now give you: Top Ten Reasons I Won't Jump Without A Cypres: #10) I'm afraid of freefalling into a flock of migrating waterfowl and getting knocked out. #9) I'm afraid someone so confident in their abilities and fate that THEY jump without a Cypres will somehow get knocked out and take me out with them. #8) I'm such a lech I'm afraid I'll get distracted by a pretty face in a window of a passing airliner and forget to pull. #7) We're afraid because we think one of our personalities may be suicidal. #6) I aint afraid of dyin', but should something tragic happen the DZ dirt would clash horribly with my matching rig and competition suit. #5) I've carefully calculated my wingloading and not having a Cypres would blow THAT all to hell. #4) I took it all at poker night and my jumping buddies can no longer be counted on to chase me down and pull for me if anything bad happens. #3) I've been hacking the firmware to win low-pull contests... #2) ...and so far I'm undefeated. And lastly, The Number One Reason I won't Jump Without A Cypres: #1) The damn thing cost me 1200 bucks and it's GOING.

Thursday. I'll be @!#$ing 50 on Thursday, Ahh, at least I'm the most immature 50 you ever saw, that's gotta be worth something.

Or even of you post to the wrong thread! LOL!

You know you might be a Lutz if your name has become a synonym for acts of stupidity. (Is that redundant?) If he thought THAT was gonna work after signing all the waivers and buying video he'd be as bad a lawyer as he was a skydiver. On the other hand he did sue the power company...

Speaking of Para-Flite, Buy-it-now! No Advertising in the Forums

I have to admit I semi-Lutzed a couple of AFF jumps but I didn't do enough wrong to make me famous. "DON'T BE A LUTZ!"

Okay, but start with the idiot student. I vote we make it official: name the Stupidist Student Award the Scott Lutz trophy, and define "Lutz Out" (i.e. to Lutz, Lutz, etc.) as anyone who: Spends a day in a FJC and then goes fetal, and/or "deploys" via cutaway, and/or allows his canopy to fly into any fixed object, and/or claims faulty training, and/or files suit after unsuccessfully commiting suicide Edited to add: Damn! Bumped up from Newbie! I was gonna save that for my birthday.

Original poster wrote "It was purported to have been night-jump related earlier this week?"

Blue Dolphin?

Correct me if I'm wrong, but wasn't the problem with that dive the fact that the jumpers hand was wrapped in some lines, which resulted in a very low cutaway and reserve pull?

The new stadium is gonna be the end of the world as we know it. Half drunk? They used to be ALL drunk!

Hey, I'll do anything if it keeps the MD's from going digital on me. After all, I'm an analog kinda guy...

A blind wreckdotters' sig line went "Flare when you hear the crickets!" Probably doesn't work so well if Cicadas are in...

It's easy for drunks to post to the wreck. They do it all the time. You just gotta get unstable.

Hard to say. I worked that form a little; the hospital payments were very low, as were the dental, so you'd better have other protection; the weekly benefit is good for 26 weeks, and along with the death benefit and liability payments represent the best part of the coverage, such as it is. Interesting the types of serach and rescue operations they'll pay for. It's not as expensive as I thought it might be, but tick it up to 10 units and it gets more serious. Really hard to say.