Quoted from post #61:
I have had very mixed emotions about the list. I have read it from beginning to end. I visit it on occasion. I always pause at #103, take a deep breath and scroll on down to #104. I start to cry and I want to scream at Nick "he is more than a number on a list! He is my husband! #104 is Joe Lathrop, the love of my life!Wonderful Father to 3 children! The kindest, funniest, sexiest, thoughtful, most remarkable, beautiful man that ever walked the earth!#104 is where my life stands still. Where my future ended. It is the shattered remains of all my dreams, my hopes, my happiness, my heart, my world, my everything. NOT a number. And I cry and yell at the world for awhile.
Then I dry my tears, and take a step back. I think about "why" the list is there. Joe, knew about the list, and certainly never wanted to be on it. But, if one person reads his story, and learns from it, than it is quite possible, his story may have kept someone off the list. That is what he would have wanted.
As a future BASE jumper, the list is very sobering. I believe it should be read by anyone considering BASE.
The only suggestion I could add if it were to be changed. Because, everyone feels so different, and it is so personal. The public or media should not be a concern, they don't have to get it, or approve. Maybe if a spouse or close family or friends have strong feelings about their loved one on the list, a photo and or name could be witheld out of respect for them.
As much as it pains me to see my husband there, I think you do a good job, Nick. And I'm sorry the list keeps you busy.
I am truely sorry for your loss Jimmy, I just had my closest friend (I considered her my sister) die unexpectedly from cancer...not the same, but yet still the same in the feelings of loss. The above quote is from the wife of one of the fatalities. You have not had to lose your wife yet and your wife has not lost you, so you cannot know how much more of a loss this is to ms.sofaking unless you know her. Any loss hurts, but the loss of the father of your children and the love of your life...I can't even begin to imagine. Yet, she wants the list to continue to help others out. Her husband's death in base came from probably not removing a packing assist (IIRC). Don't you think people could learn from that. For me, I think I learn more by putting a name and a face to the lesson so it becomes more personal than just having faceless statistics that mean nothing to me.
Nick, I can understand you taking the list down. It has to be so hard to do the list and it has to weigh very heavily on your heart too. I am sure this was just the final straw that broke your back and made you say...it's not worth the fight anymore. I would like to ask you to reconsider your decision based on the fact that from what I have seen, most people here understand and need the list, and want it to remain the same.