I'm glad you posted this. I'm also a single mom, and a few years ago I had a reunion with cocaine after about 15 years without it. When I stopped using back then, I kind of knew there was a problem, but it wasn't a BIG problem. Years later, though, the downward spiral was fast and intense when I started using again. Good for you for recognizing a problem now.
Quitting again in '04 (and since) has been a different struggle. The 12 steps didn't sit well with me, and I read and thought about different "programs" to help. In the end, I just made a decision to not use anymore. Friends who were supportive of my quitting were a huge help, but only because I really had the determination to stop and because they weren't the kind of friends to sugar coat things. There was no choice really, if I wanted to keep living without destroying everything I had worked for and keep my child. And I did want to do both of those things.
It still tugs at me, pretty strongly from time to time. So far, I've still been able to decide not to use every time. Somehow reason has won out so far. I hope it continues to do so in the future. Sometimes I really wonder how many times I can successfully make the same choice. Guess that only depends on me.
I don't think you can make another person quit, but I can hope for your friend's sake that she'll see the problem and have a desire to change her path. Good luck to you as you work through the coming days and months.
Thanks for this post.
