captainquim

oh well, don't blame him. we all get confused sometimes. now and then i think i'm batman

crwpj, a bit menstrual today crwpj?

or, you could just use the good old sex muscle, nooooo..... your head. head. see, when it comes to the underside of a roof garden, no man can compete with the orange, sometimes gravy tasting tones of a complete stranger's waxed tash. innit

listen up, you have to look for the REAL meaning. the sexually deviant, uplifting, rabit rearing... whatever... meaning. see? it's all about the 80s

there once was a monkey named pichoko. he lived in a hill of karma beans with pink flowers on the side and tropicana flowed like flowy things. one day, a dark cloud came over the hill with baboons in tow, and flicked the switch of terrifying flying thorn bushes. oh no! what was pichoko to do? well, fortunately he had his trusty ant hole, and he climbed inside and did nothing for five years. eventually, once his leg had grown back, since in the second year he had to cut it off to feed the pet cats that had moved in next door and erected a monstrosity of a conservatory, he crawled out and readjusted his eyes to the light with the revolutionary new mind patch that ran off a hand held pc running linux. this being done, he set about building the new world order of competitive fence erection, running down The Great Ridge. numerous challenges were surmounted including but not excluding and including again - the formation of hillside cheese eating picnic centres, the now world famous artificially intelligent lama races (they were born out of the collaboration between the feared penguin and whirpool washing machine alliance, bringing great leaps in sandwich manufacture technology - you will, of course, know the hairy loose leaf sweetcorn munch and retarded duck mayonnaise combo that took the south american 2 minute baguette challenge by storm), the oppression of the newly resplendent ox farmers that had beguiled the princess of the third vegetable patch on the left of the greenhouse belonging to geoffrey, that produced the world's largest organically grown swede (which we fondly remember as No. 6, and was the main ingredient in the fantastic pie that missus hobergauder made for the joyous shed party in november). this is of course not an exhaustive list, and new challenges arise daily, nay, hourly and are formally logged by the council of badger baiters in league with afghan jelly farmers, that tirelessly minute the sit down meetings conducted in spanish only. being a very lucky monkey, his gas cooker had an extra hob dedicated to the furtherment of egg boiling technology, bringing back the watercress growing races that characterised the fifth dynasty (the years between the rules of the gregory and fullumly families) and left an indelible imprint on the psyches of all known arthropods, which were forced to hop on only one toe, and hence developed very hardy immune systems, making them ideal for food service. nose licking has become popular, as pichoko took to sporting a raspberry compote on his nasal orifice, and being a cumly fellow, was happy for the tongues of a nation to stroke his facial area. now i'm sure you will be concerned to return to the weighty matter of those pesky cats and that conservatory.... musky tones, and grape rolling saved a famished smith family, and pichoko was forced onto the back foot! being a child of the cubist era, he did like a slouch now and then, but due to unforseen spring weakening, the sofas had become uncomfortable, and standing whilst watching the tv was now en vogue. so, in the end, it was all just a raging effulent geyser, fuelling the growth of lychen in the lower part of the hill which undermined the vegetable farmers, and hence wheelchairs were stockpiled and created the new continent of eropos. now i realise that all this seems unconnected, but viewed from the vantage point of being hungarian, i think that we all see that a final showdown with the gravy boat designers is unavoidable. pichoko, being a canny statesmen realised this from the very beginning, and had mortgaged his bmx with the gold trick bars, and deposited the sizeable proceeds in an environmentally concious equity plan managed by jon the african. jon with his voluminous knowledge of bamboo growing, had contacted the head of the indian eugenics program violations committee on tuesday the 3rd, which is incongruent with all the teachings of betty boothroyd, as such meetings were decreed to take place on wednesdays.

thanks dude, you said 'we have seen many of our canopies....' can i ask who 'we' are? thanks

hi people, is is safe to use pd soft links with HMA lines. i know that HMA lines are often not cascaded due to excess wear - so was wondering if the line used in pd soft links would produce to much wear?

oh yeh man, i saw that, but we brits call it surgeon's rap, so i thought it was only only for use in medical or veterinary circles. thanks for the advice, i'll try it and let you know. presumably it won't come off in the water no (because i'm always in it )

hey dude, what is vet rap? i presume it will help with my grip problem?

i have recently carried out the following mod on my rear risers.... i have found that sliding the plastic d link protectors on my rear risers half way down my mini risers is helping me to grip them. i have found that when i stab the rear risers at the start of my swoop, sometimes my hands slip and i have to go straight on to toggles. i have spoken to a uspa rigger and he suggested putting some dive loops onto the front side of my rear risers, but i am worried that the excess brake line will get caught in them on opening. has anyone else got a rear riser dive loop mod, or heard of any other modifications that can solve this problem?

nice picks geezer, we should do it again.

I got HCMF 'Hard Core Muth@ Fukk@' oh, and i got a biscuit too.

saw sport parachute stall in university union building - was with 4 other friends who were all quite drunk (as was i), thought it would be funny as we had just got our student loans through, signed up. did a static line. kind of forgot about it. then got a cheque for £900 - deposit refund on an expensive flat. didn't know what to do with it until a friend pointed out that it was an AFF course in empuriabrava. had booked it within the next day. i went out there with another friend (who was one of the guys i did the static line with). we planned just to do AFF, then go around spain trying to shag as many women as possible, but after our first jumps we decided to stay right there and max out our credit cards. left there 2 weeks later with 40 jumps, an AFF course, 10 consolidation jumps, Sky U course and FS1. got back decided everything else was far too boring, moved next to the dropzone. now i have 150 jumps, i have just quit my job (friday), am learning to pack tandems and am gonna become a dz bum and head off around the world. fuck it.

150/1 reserve ride on first pack job - no practice pack jobs before that one, didn't have anyone watching me pack either. oops.

i find that when there is someone near you that you don't want to speak to, or there is some one coming towards you and there is about to be one of those - do i 1)stop and speak to them and chat inane bullshit for a minute, endure a painful silence whilst you think of what to say, then say see ya later or 2)just flash an eyebrow and keep walking - i like to get out my mobile phone and pretend that someone has rung me and begin a fake conversation so that they don't interrupt you - then the eyebrow flash will do - situation avoided. the wonders of technology!

Quote "Do I look fat in this dress?". Is there really a correct answer to this question? answer 'no, you look fat in that fat' mind you - only if it's appropriate and they understand you are joking - or you are in trouble

yeah check it out Prostitute penguins fcuk for rocks Penguins need stones to build their nests. Shortages of the stones have seen female penguins trading sex for stones - the only known instance of prostitution in the animal world. The game birds find an unsuspecting single male, shag him and then run off with his stone. Their partners remain blissfully unaware of their mate's dark sexual secrets.

i think that the reason these differences occur is ingrained in our psyches. historically, women need A man to give them kiddies, take care of the kiddies and themselves by finding food and protecting them generally. men want sex - as much as possible to spread their gene pool far and wide. this means that our two genders think in very different ways becasue what is important to the relevant sexes is opposite - meaning that we find each other's behaviour unintelligible and even deplorable. now you can say that this no longer applies in the modern world - equality etc. now i agree with this in principle, but i believe that these attitudes that i have mentioned are inate. we act instinctively just as female penguins indulge in prostitution (they sh@g for rocks to build their nests) - no one told them to do this - they just do it. nevermind. at least we have planes, fuel and parachutes.

sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet! you can't have the vids, i've burnt them as an offering to the hamster gods

i would jump. all that jumpsuit bullsh!t is just jor show. you can still jump in jeans and t-shirt. what is the point in sitting on the ground caressing your new suit, when you can't use it?

i don't have any specific rigging questions at the moment. this is what worries me. the fact that i don't know enough even to ask the questions has prompted me to find out more.

when you've hooked in your cheque book too low, you use the trusty plastic as an out. did you not get taught this during AFF?

dooooood, you wanna see a nutty foreign film, take a look at 'Man Bites Dog' It is french, well, belgian actually, but despite this, it is very good. black & white and subtitled, but it rocks! it won an award at the 1996 cannes film festival. it has disturbed many of my friends so beware - if anyone has seen it, or you watch it, bear in mind that i told my friends that it was real, and they believe that to this day. that thought keeps me chuckling to myself all the time (people think i should have been in the film as a result). i realise that all of this ranting is absolute nonsense if you have never seen the film, so hopefully you will now be curious enough to do so.

get a matter suit. nice and tight, grips if you want them. expensive, but good. contact babylon

i didn't really mean in the specific case of fast openings etc - it just appeared to me that BASE participants paid a lot more attention to rigging & packing and seem to have a much more in depth knowledge that skydivers don't seem to be interested in - such as packing for nose first inflations to reduce line overs - virtually all the skydivers i know simply roll it up and jam it in the bag (just an example - i don't even know if you can make any adjustments to packing with skydiving kit as opposed to BASE specific kit that would allow this technique. my point is that factors such as these are considered in BASE). there are lots of other things that i read about, but didn't really understand, so i wanted to find out about them to see if they would be of any benefit to me. i realise that many of the factors that are taken into account in BASE are done so because the BASE environment is more demanding - you are not opening within feet of a big f*cking wall in a skydive (hopefully), but still - the way i see it, the more knowledge the better - when you are lying on the ground with many broken bones and claret all over you, pleading ignorance is not gonna make you better!